The Luckiest

"I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here

And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know

That I am The luckiest."


December 28th marked our 4 year anniversary. We didn't do much but it atleast gave me reason to sit back in my leather bound chair and think back about life, and our relationship. I was listening to my new ipod shuffle, and a Ben Folds Five song was softly playing in my ear, and he started talking to me with a beautiful melody was echoing through my mind and my thoughts began to dance to the soft piano notes. Then he began to sing the words that echoed my thoughts, especially the first few lines...

Check out the song if you can locate it,

Ben Folds Five
the Luckiest

That is just the first verse...

Practice Cafe

So I can officially say I finished my first week now. I was supposed to start on Monday, and showed up to move into my apartment on Saturday with a Uhaul, and the Inlaws ready to get everything sitiated, and I was made aware that the apartment was never approved for us to move in. (although we had been told a week earlier that it was ready, and they were expecting us.) It was a giant fiasco that ended in us staying the weekend with my new fantastic, and totally awesome boss, Rebecca Palmer. Hannah got sick, and Monday at around 12:00pm we were finally given the ok to sign the contract and move into our apartment. By then it was only me, and Jared (my boss's husband) so we moved everything into the apartment, and slowly we, by we I mean Heather, have begun putting everything in the right places, and getting it into a livable/homey condition. We have our Christmas tree up, and decorations are placed sparatically around the rooms, and it has been rather nice.

I finally started work last Tuesday, and I pretty much just hit the ground running, with a few trips on the way. They were already pretty busy, so they kinda just threw me on some projects, and I just worked my way through them asking TONS of questions along the way. I have a huge desk, my own phone (with my own extention & voice mail,) a G5 MAC with a dope flat screen monitor.

their are 3 designers that work their, two of us (including me) are brand spanking new, and whenever a new logo is being designed everyone gets to take a stab at it, then as an office we pick the best 6-8 of everyones, and send them to the client, then whoever's get's picked they pretty much take over the rest of the file. So today we heard back from the first Logo I took part in designing, and one of mine was chosen. I have to say I was quite shocked, and at the same time I was giddy as a school girl.

My desk has slowly become consumed with projects, and I find myself having to force myself to go home, one day I just totally skipped lunch working straight through...

It's madness, but it is so much fun, I'm LOVING it!

UpDate Central

I am doing absolutly nothing, just hanging out at home, watching TV, making several pointless trips to Target and Wal*Mart, we finally got ahold of some boxes to start packing, but then it's like what do you pack, and what do you wait to pack, cause we still ahve to live, and use things, and wear clothes and somehow function. I wish I had enough money to pay some people to just come in and pack everything up for me into a truck drive it to Austin, and unload it all. That would be awesome!

Moving sucks, and also we havent officially heard wheather or not we have even gotten the apartment...

Newness!

Well around two weeks ago on Thursday after lunch I was notified that I would be laid off and my last day was October 31st. So I spent the second half of my day sending my resume out to as many places as I could find for a new job. I even sent it out to three or four places in Austin just to give myself more of a chance. By the end of that day two places contacted me, one is Austin, called Practice Cafe, and another in San Antonio, not sure what the name of it is. Friday I recieved another response from a diffrent company in Austin called Practice Cafe. They invited me out for an interview last Wed. So I put together a small book of different logos I have designed as something they could keep to remember me by. They were planning on hiring one person. The interview went great, and they told me they would know who they would hire by Friday. So Friday rolled around and my phone rang around 1:30pm my heart was pounding and they informed me that they had already hired someone but they were now contemplating hiring two people and I was the second person. The only thing was they wouldn't know until Tuesday (Today). So today went by very slow, tense, and stressfull. There hours past without a single call. Soon 3:30pm rolls around and hope was beiginng to slowly fade from my system. I decided to make a call, where I recieved an answering machine and I left a very brief message. Three hours rolled by without a single call. That was until 6:00pm when my phone finally rang, and it was them...

I GOT THE JOB!!!

I start on November 27th...

So now Austin will be our new home!

FEATURED

If you would please direct your attention to:

Logo Pond

my logos are being featured for the public to vote on and rip apart in the form of a comments (or they can rain down praise) Anyways if you have the time please skip on over there and take a little peak, if you have more time, well get a free membership to the site, and make a vote, if you still have time leave a comment, they are always apreciated please include the words, "AWSOME," "BRILLIANT," "INCREDABLE," "FABULOUSE," and any other words that would communicate good positive thoughts.

Hannah

Hannah Originally uploaded by shaneguymon.

Here are some new photos of Hannah from this weekend which also happened to be my birthday. So Happy birthday to me, I am now the ripe ol' age of 26 which brings me on a down hill slope towards 30. I can already feel it in my back. Although in my mind, and my heart I still think I'm 18, and some people would say my face would give a good arguement, especially since most people I run into think I'm either in High school or just graduated. Anyways I hope you enjoy the photos, if you click on the one to the side, it should take you to a set of pictures. I'll be adding more in the near future, because I really need to get my flickr account back up, I've been neglecting it, and it is really awesome when you get into it and really see how it works, and all that you can do with it.

CEILING FAN

I stare aimlessly watching a ceiling fan spin round and round, I roll over to the side kicking my feet off the bed as I turn my body smoothly into a sitting position with my feet softly touching the carpet. My eyes quickly scan the dark room to gather my surroundings, and soon I gather myself together enough to lift myself completely from the bed, and somehow I still feel weightless as I make my way into the closet and grab some socks and shoes along with a cool shirt to wear. I sit myself back down onto the bed slowly and slide my socks and shoes onto my feet, and tie my shoes up tightly. I get into my car and take turn on the radio, the length of the drive seems shorter than usual as I reach my destination and as soon as I open my car door I can immediately hear the sound of squeaking shoes, and a bouncing ball. As I enter the gym it seems as though everyone knows my name, and they all speak highly of my abilities to play the game. Suddenly the feelings of having to live up to their remarks enter my mind and sinks deep into my chest. I step out onto the floor and each step I take is as though I am walking on the moon. So as I start to dribble and make a move it is slow, and hard, and I become lifted up into the air slowly rising and floating. Everyone else seems to be able to move about as a normal person would. I grow frustrated with this, as I am unable to get to the basket. I begin to shoot the ball, only every shot ends up being short no matter how much effort I put into heaving the ball towards the basket. Each step I take leaves me floating into the air and I try and try to force myself to stay on the ground. Soon the air is filled with counter arguments refuting all the positive remarks referring to me. Then the excuses begin raining down drenching everyone on the floor, until I my frustrations grow.

I stare aimlessly watching a ceiling fan spin round and round, mundanely spinning in circles in a dark room. Throwing shadows on the wall that grow in huge proportions as they stretch forth across the four walls. Soon I began to feel the weight of my body and the softness of the sheets against me, and the sound of my cell phone beeping beside me slowly forces its way through my ears into my brain.

BIRTHDAY

Mark your calanders because Saturday October 14th is the day the earth was blessed with the presence of Shane Michael Guymon.

marca seus calandarios por que este Sabado dia 14 de Outubro e o dia que este planeto foi beincaodo com a presenca de Shane Michael Guymon.

Learning

Sometimes I have to remind myself that right is not always easy. It has been said, "Enter ye in at the strait gate; for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, which leadeth to destruction, and many there be who go in there at; Because strait is the agate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."1

Many times when life gets hard and difficult I begin to get discouraged that perhaps I have erred, and perhaps I have made some wrong choice, or have sinned. Then I have to remind myself that the right choice is not always the easy choice. What does that exactly mean, well it means that trials, hardships, obstacles, struggles, and tribulation are not in any way signs of sinning, nor is it a punishment.

We are all here on this earth to learn and grow, and the only way to learn and grow is through struggle, and pain. I read something the other day, I've read it many times before, but it was inspiring to read this last time, "My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; And then, if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes."2

No one's life is easy, and all too often I get caught up in the belief that if I had more money then I would be happy, and ok, or if I had two cars, or if I had a house to call a home. Although all of these would be great comforts they in know way ensure mine, or anyone else's happiness.

Am I idlely wasting away my days with blind faith in God, is my trust in him in vain because of my slothfulness? I would fight the fight that my efforts are in the eternal progression of my soul, and I am in a constant battle to improve, and be perfected. It is a long and slow battle, but I feel that each and every day I am making the small steps in the right directions. Sure I slip and fall throughout my journey.

It is funny I was explaining it to a friend the other day, and the best I could do was to compare it to math, which I am terrible at, but it was the best comparison I could come up with to illustrate life. You see first you need to learn the formula, to figure out the problems of life. Once you figure out the formula you study it. However even if you have a great knowledge of the functionality of the formula many times you will still get the wrong answer. So in life I can honestly say that I know the formula, yet still many times I get the wrong answer. Whether it be out of pride in my knowledge in the formula, to where I try to speed through the problem, and stumble and fall, or whether I grow lazy, and carelessly fall to the way side, regardless of the reasoning I still get the wrong answer.

Vote For Shane

I recently submitted some designs to Threadless.com. Please take the time to click on the links on the right under "Vote For Shane." Be sure to give me a whopping "5." So we can ALL be winners.

Eu deseinei algumas deseinhos por um T-Shirt, entao por favor vota por Shane para que eu posso ganhar. Tem um link no direito embaixo do "Vote For Shane"

Dancing Machine

She woke up crying this morning, and pretty thirsty to put it best. So as soon as she got her sippy cup in her hands she was pretty good to go. So I turned on the TV, and started watching Good Morning America. When Hannah put her drink down and began dancing and spinning around and just lauphing and lauphing up a storm. No music was playing, I suppose she just wanted to dance.

She really loves the theme song to 7th Heaven (not sure why) So the other night I was giving her a bath, and she was having fun, and playing in the tub splashing around and jibber jabbing. When all of a sudden she popped up and started swaying back and forth, leaning lower and lower as she swayed. I was a little confused until the background noise of the TV finally seaped into my ears and I noticed 7th Heaven was on in the other room. It was just hilariouse that she noticed it, and started dancing in the tub.

She has a new routine, now around 8:30 she will usually grab her blanket climb her way up onto the couch with me and then roll and push her head into my chest, arm, head, or pretty much whatever is by her head when she gets up there, and she starts rolling in circles as if she is trying to get comfortable, and then she will suck her fingures and lay still for a few seconds until she repeats the process. So then I will ask her if she is ready to go to sleep, or go night night. Then she will grab her blanket slide off the couch and march her wobbly little legs towards her room, making her way down the hall with me following close in her footsteps. I push her bedroom door open and she rounds the corner making her way to her crib where she stands in front with her arms raised. So I lift her up hug her, kiss her, and say good night and she rolls herself up in her blanket and jibber jabbers her way to sleep. It's the cutest thing in the world and I really really hope I can always invision her wobbling her way to the room, with her little scrawny legs, and cute little face, and the way her bright blue eyes gaze back at me as I lay her down to sleep.

Control

So as a new parent I've been thinking alot about how to raise my child. I am under the impression that complete control never works out. So I feel that you should teach a person correct principles, or right and wrong, and tehn let them govern themselves. Of course that does leave taht time gap of teaching. So I have heard some analogies against this theory. One being about a trip to the zoo. So you are at the zoo and the cage to the lions is open, your child turns to you and says, I wanna go into the lions cage... What do you do. Well you see, I am not an idiot. But also I don't think that necesarily constitutes letting them govern themselvs. So like I said, there is an alotted amount of time where teaching has to take place. So if the kid is 19 years old and is still saying I wanna go into the lions cage, well then your kid is an idot, or perhaps they just no something about lions that you don't. MY whole phylosify stems from teh whole idea, that your kids are going to reach a point where you aren't always with them. So when that time comes you aren't going to be able to control them any longer. The way I see it, if you control them throughout there youth, you are only going to build up alot of resentment, and also the whole idea of shielding them from danger is just not going to be succesful. Life is about choices, and choices means mistakes, and mistakes usually result in learning, thats life. So if you never let your children make any choices, and you never give them room to make mistakes, and learn and grow through them, then you are only hurting them. I mean if you raise your kids in a bubble there whole life, sure they will apear to be perfectly healthy, infact you could support that arguement by the fact they have never been sick. But as soon as they leave that protective bubble, there bodies, not having any type of a imune system built up with get sick awhole lot faster, and more often. Anyways back to my control analogy, if you control your kids, and don't give them the oportunity at some point to make there own decisions, then once they are out of your control, they won't know what to do with all the freedom. They will go wild, and make too many mistakes, and they may not be able to recover or learn from them, either that or the recovery time will be so long, that they will end up digressing, and it will set them back that much farther.

Now the question comes, what is the age where you let them begin to do this. I say let it happen slowly, and I would say a good starting point is around 8. Again I said I would ease them into the whole choice aspect. I wouldn't just unleash them, let it be gradual.

I remember on my mission, while in the MTC (Missionary Training Center) we were pretty controled, just by the fact that we were in a closed area. I mean there was no where to go, you were confined. Then the day came when we enetered into our actual mission and left the training center. I remember being in the mission office, they had given us a portion of our allowance, which was more money then I had seen up to that point. I was new to the country, and to the mission, so I had no concept of how much money I actually had. I mean it was a diffrent currancy, I was still thinking in dollars. I had no concept of budget. So we all get hungry, and we are used to, at a certain time of day going to a cafeteria, where the food is prepared for us, we have a few options of what to eat, but not many. So we say, "We're hungry, when are we eating lunch." They look at us, and say whenever you want. Then we say, well how are we supposed to get food. They say, you got money, and you got two feet, you figure it out, jsut make sure you take one person with you. Well we all still stuck together, we weren't used to being apart, we had been together for 9 weeks straight. So we venture first across the street to this bakery, we are all starving, and they ahve food, lots of food. So I just start buying stuff, and then next thing we know, we find out about a mall a few blocks away, where there is a McDonalds as well as some other restarauntes. So we head over there and spend more money. The next day I get my new companion, and enter my actual area, with next to no money left. I had another two weeks to go, and I needed to pay for bus fair as well as the metro. So for the next few nights, I went hungry while my companion who's mom would send him a nice fresh $20.00 bill in each letter she wrote for a whole year straight, was eating, and eating nicely. I look back now, and think he is a JERK. But hey when freedom is released all at once on you, and sometimes they think the control, protects you, and the protection is teaching you. It isn't until you are left by yourself, and on your own that you realize how much you really know. I mean I survived, I lived and I learned. I never ran out of money again, and I learned how to budget. It was a good experience.

Well I know you probably don't give a dime
but thats my two cents...

Thoughts

Sometimes you reach a point in your life, it is like a brick wall. Sometimes things seem to just not go right. The natural instinct of a person is to automatically begin to trace back their actions of the past, or perhaps rewind their life and figure out what went wrong. It makes me wonder what they are truly searching for. Sometimes I think people actually have the aspirations of one day reaching the point of never having to suffer again. They truly believe that their will come a day that their will be no more struggles, and that life will move smooth. People begin to ponder over what changes in their life can bring this to pass. They start to pick apart their life and turn it into a what if. What if I had more money. What if I wasn't married, They trace back their past decisions, the past steps they have taken throughout their life. They begin to picture their life if they would of made the opposing decision, and in their mind they paint a picture of the "what if" life, and it always seems pretty, and beautiful. It appears to be problem free. Only happy feelings exist their. Why is this?

I seem to feel as if I am making the right decisions, then I look at other peoples lives, only from a distance. It's like looking at a painting, an oil painting. Their is one thing I have noticed in my career, or in my history of art, any time you look at a painting from a distance it seems to be perfect. In fact I took a class in college and one of our first projects was to pick a painting and reproduce it using the computer, using Photoshop to be exact. My reproduction seemed to be coming along very well. Other class mates would look at my computer screen from across the class at a distance, I noticed them starting to walk up to my computer to gain a closer look. Only when they came closer I would turn to see their face and disappointment would be staring back at me. I then zoomed out of my computer, to see the view they were looking at. I even got up and stood across the room, and looked at my screen. On my screen was a reproduction of a painting that appeared to be an exact replica of the painting. But at a closer look it was a blob of mush, just colors mixed together, and a blur of reality. I think that is the same vision we gain of our peers lives. I see the lives of friends and family, and everything seems to be going right for them. I wonder what I am doing wrong, and what everyone else is doing right. I talk to friends from my mission, and they are living in houses, they have good paying jobs, they are happy. They aren't struggling to pay there bills. So I begin to trace through the blue print of my life, only I am staring through a microscope, and I see every single tiny flaw of my life. Then I begin to create the reason for the problems in my life. I begin to understand why things aren't going right. I'm a freakin loser. Why should things work out. Either that or you don't see flaws, and you see that you have been doing the right things. So then you need an ulterior reason for your mishaps. So then you think some greater power is against you, but for everyone else. So then you start rethinking your whole reason behind what you do, and why you do it. Then you start to justify wrong actions, you begin to say well I was doing the right things, and it wasn't working.

But that brings up a question in my mind. Why should a good decision equal an instant reward. Why should a bad decision equal an instant consequence. I feel that if that were the case it would be to easy. Besides you shouldn't do good things, or live a morally clean life because you will be rewarded, you should do it out of respect for yourself. You should do it for the soul purpose of it being the right thing. Do it because you want to do it, not for what you potentially will receive. So then I look at my life, and all I need to work on. I see all my weaknesses, but they aren't reasons. I think I struggle so that I can learn. I think you are able to truly understand people and yourself when you are in a crisis. That is when a true person appears, that is when you really see who you are, and who others are.

In Highschool in basketball I would notice how hard people would practice during practice, when the coach was there with the whistle hanging loosely at the tip of his lip. His arms to his waist, and his back at a subtle slouch. Everyone was running, and pushing themselves. Then I would get on that same court with the same people only the coach would be gone, and not present in the gym. Then you would see how they really played. That is when you would see who your team mates really were. It is the choices you make when you aren't seeing any selfish rewards to reap. It is the choices that people make for themselves, the choices made when no one is around, when no one is looking. The choices someone makes when they are walking down a street all alone with everyone locked away in there houses, and a wallet is on the street. The decision you make right then and their is who YOU really are. So God wants to know who we really are, so he leaves us to ourselves, he sees what types of decisions we make all alone. But truthfully it isn't so God can see who we really are. I don't think that is the purpose of this life. Infect that is what everyone feeds you. It is like that poem about footprints. I don't by into that, I don't think God is carrying us through the hardest parts of our life. I think we are all alone, and I don't think it is for him, I think it is so we can finally figure out who we are. I think there is a disease in the world today, and I think that the majority of the world doesn't know who they are. They haven't stopped long envoy to think about it. They spend to much time tracing back the steps of their lives, trying to figure out who is to blame for the problems of there lives. They want to know why there life isn't moving smoothly, like the paintings of the peoples lives they see off in the distance.

I find myself doing the same thing, the difference is I try to take the time in myself to stop myself, and then I begin to analyze myself instead, I try to see the areas of my life I need to work on. Then I question my purpose. I ask myself why I want to be that type of person. Anytime I catch myself answering in a selfish response, like of what type of reward or blessing I will receive from a decision, I stamp it void, and I think of a new purpose. Until I finally realize the true reason for living up to the standards that I have set for myself. It's so I can respect myself, it is so when I look in the mirror I will love the person I am looking at. If I don't love that person how can I ever expect anyone else to. So when I begin to see my life, and then I question my choices, and I judge the correctness of my choices by where I am in life. Like as in with my job situation, I started to think judge my decision on my job by how it has ended up for me, and I am seeing that it is all going down hill, I am not making as much as expected, and I am seeing other things in my life crashing down around me. So then I start to think I must of made the wrong decision because my life isn't smoothly flowing along.

Infact I look back at all my decisions in life, and I think about how everything just seems to be crashing down around me, and problem after problem keeps coming right after the other, until I have a mountain of problems, only when people look at my life from a distance they see a small hill of problems. Only I am right up next to the problems, so they seem to be a mountain of problems. So then I start to think that I don't know what I am doing, and I am just making all the wrong decisions, because for some reason I have built up this expectation that a right decision in life should mean an absence of all problems. So if we were to all make the right decisions in life, then we would be able to breeze through life without any struggles or hardships. I even see my family and peers staring at me, and pointing there finger and telling me, "See I told you not to make that decision." "I told you not to buy that car." "You shouldn't of gotten married so soon." "I told you, you weren't ready for a baby." it goes on for days, it seems in everyone else's eyes that I can't make a decision, and they question every decision I make. They send me e-mails of warning, they tell me they are just trying to help me out. They judge my decisions of whether or not it actually clears away a nice smooth road. So I wonder why that is. Why have we all built up this mirage of reality, that the proof of a good decision is the absence of strife, and an absence of obstacles in our path? (this in no way is stating taht I don't want people to express there opinions with me, I apreciate all advice, I am only questioning the reason for it)

So how can we really judge whether a decision were the right or wrong decision?

My answer, which I have come to through 24 (almost 25) years of life is that you judge a decision by how you come out of it in the end. I say if you progressed, and came away a stronger and a better person, then it was a right decision. If you come out of it a weaker person, then it was a bad decision. If it stops your progression.

A Proclamation

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below
when your too in love to let it go
If you never try you'll never know
Just what your worth

danuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh nuh

as the guitar solo comes creeping in through the speakers, before no time you begin to hear the drums start to bang, next through your ear comes the vibrations of other elecrtical sounds, and then everyone comes together in one voice...

Lights will guide you home
and ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

and the music plays!

Tears stream down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears streaming down your face and I

Now you can really feel the words in your soul....

Tears stream down your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down your face and I

Then the music stops, and quietly you hear one soul voice...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Thats how my day began as I was driving in Heather's truck on my way down 35 to work, I had just picked up some free chic-file chicken mini's for breakfast, and The Kid Kratic show went to a comercial break, so I decided to play a song from my new Cold Play X&Y CD. Little did I know that that song would pretty much be the soundtrack of my day...

Mom called me around lunch time with tears in her voice, it seems as though her day was going about as well as mine, I drew this picture of a freakin field mouse and went to save it, and BAM the program quit on me, their went an hour of work down the drain, I was able to get started with a new one and thrity minutes into it I tried to save again and BAM! the program quit and I lost it again. MAC's are far superior to any other computer, and they never have any problems, or bugs, atleast thats what the vibe is around the world by fellow MAC users... I don't by it, I have yet to see any real benefit to a MAC over a PC...

Well Heather hasn't had too good of a day, I got a few calls from her as well. It is times like these that I like to reflect on the importance of family, and the eternal aspect of a family. I hold strong desires to have a united family, I have never really liked the fact that I have grown up with out any real relationships with any of my Uncles, Aunts, Cousins, and not really even my Grandparents.
You know it has always been my view, that family includes all of that, and then when one of your brothers or sisters get's married it is my firm opinion that the spouse of your brother or sister becomes apart of your family. So then when we speak of loyalty to family we speak of the spouse as well. So then regardless of issues I myself will and do love the spouses of my brothers and sisters. Some of them I may not agree with some of their views, or perhaps just don't connect well with them, but my eyes see past peoples faults, and short comings. I see past these things and I love them all unconditionally, I don't hold grudges, and I don't hold tight to their mistakes they have made in life, and hold that against them and throw them to the wayside as a "bad person" I still remain cordial, and greet them and depart from them with open arms. In my view taht is what family is all about, remaining loyal, and true. The love that comes from a family should never waver, it should be a constant, it is in the family that you should be able to seek comfort and shelter.

Atleast that is my views on the subject, like always I already know Mark will disagree with me, because in his words me and my friend "Bucktooth" always have twisted views of reallity, and my whole phylosiphy on life is alwasy just alittle off, I mean in all reallity he is just not sure if I am just stupid, or if really I am just so prideful and hardheaded. So let me go ahead and chalk it up to both, we can all come to a solid agreement today, and this can be my "coming out" party, It is both, I am stupid and prideful. The sadder thing is, I've never really asked for anyone to agree with me, in fact anytime I am in an arguement with Mark, or Matt, or anyone else it isn't that I am argueing with them to convince them of my opinion being superior but really I am striving to clearify and untangle the opinion after they destroy it and mis-interpret it, I could care less if anyone agrees with me, I don't believe in things because of the majority. That isn't where my beliefs come from, infact I will goes as far to say that I don't believe anything that comes out of anyones mouth, or anything I read, I seek out my own personal answers, and through my own personal dealings is where I obtain my answers. I listen and take in what everyone says, and then at the end of the night, I'm always the one who makes the decision....

Thanks to all of those who participated in the last debate.

Shane Guymon

Hannah Guymon

I bring you a new drawing I did of my beautiful daughter Hannah. So anyways I went to play ball tonight and I actually played good, I also played on Monday and I played well also. So perhaps my slump is ending, the only problem is Monday I kept losing, but tonight I actually got a few wins under my belt.

Onto other news today was my last day working at Brylane, so that is totally freakin awesome. I felt wonderful as I walked out of that building and had the hugest smile on my face as I walked out to my car. So me and Heather are doing very well these days, and Hannah is wonderful as well. We have made some big changes in our lives, and had to make a few huge decisions, and I feel that we have made the correct decisions.

The only reason I even updated was to put that drawing of Hannah up on here, so peace out!

The Fountain Drink

So I stop at a corner store to buy a fountain drink, and as I am waiting for the fiz to die down so I can fill my 32 ounce plastic cup to the brim, I place my fingure in the fizz (because thats what you do to make it happen faster). As I do this I am looking into the cup and seeing the fiz disapate (thats a nice word) and my mind becomes flooded with memories of Mark, in fact it seems almost everytime I get a fountain drink I think of Mark, now even Mark is probably asking the question, "Why does a fountain drink remind you of me?" Well their are a few reasons:

1.) I have many of a memory of Mark sneaking out to the back yard to jump over the almost falling down fence, which my dad specifically, & repeatedly told us not to jump the fence. So Mark would always jump the fence and run across Toeperwein Rd. (a semi congested road behind our house) to get a fountain drink. Their were only a handful of times which Mark would let me, his lil paesky brother go across Toeperwein with him, so those times I got to go have always stuck with me. I have never been one afraid to ask for anything, so I asked if I could go everytime, so since 9 times out of 10 I was told NO, the times when he said yes especially stuck with me.

2.) When I went to visit Mark in Utah he lived in an apartment and across the street was a corner store, so every night of the week I stayed with him, me and Mark would walk across that street, and take one of the collection of cups Mark already had in his kitchen and we would get a refill, and we would make ourselves a little mix, because Mark is the king of mixing the fountain drinks, and that too always stuck with me. I've always enjoyed spending time with my big brother, and he hasn't always wanted to spend time with his younger pest of a brother, so I always enjoyed even the smallest of moments I was able to kick it with my big brother. Even if it meant we were just gonna be rebelliouse and jump that old wooden fence and get a fountain drink. Even when the only drink I got was a sip of the fizz from the rootbeer, as Mark was waiting to fill that bad boy to the brim so we could make our treck back over that fence before my pop strolled out into the family room in his underwear and a flashlight with some fuzzy sheep skin slippers, trying to adjust the thermostat to 85 cause he didn't have enough blankets in his bed to keep himself warm in 78 degrees.

Those were the days!

So now I sit with my big red in hand, as I take a sip of the memories from the past...

Fast Food

I glanced over at the clock as we were having a short conversation regarding what we were doing for dinner. We decided on chicken, and churches chicken to be specific, seeing how I remember it closing at 9:00pm and the clock read 8:48 I didn’t have much time to conversate. So I grabbed my keys and said I love you and walked out to my car. My hand ruffled through some papers finding its way to some newly burnt CD’s, and grabbed one and glanced to see what was written in the permanent black marker. I turned up the volume to the point that the car was consumed with the vibrations of The Roots which began to flow through the speakers and into my ears, quickly my mind was and thoughts fallowed suit, and vibed along with the melody. I waited patiently as The Roots spoke to me in the drive thru. I recited my order to the speaker in front of the menu outside. He then repeated back to me, I wasn’t paying to much attention to what he was saying when I subconsciously just stated Ok as I rolled up the window and turned the stereo back up. Slowly I approached the window and reached for my wallet. Slowly the realization that I had forgotten my wallet slipped through the breaks in the beat and worked its way through my mind until the “dawning” sensation overwhelmed me with stupidity. I came to the window and as the young man leaned outside awaiting a payment method, I told him I would be back, and that I forgot my credit card. So I drove off back towards my apartment with The Roots at maximum volume hoping to drown out the embarrassment, I was hoping to get to the apartment and back to the restaurant before my cell phone began to vibrate with a call from Heather wondering where her chicken was. My first arrival at the drive thru speaker box was 8:58pm, but I saw that they didn’t actually close until 10:00pm. So I still had plenty of time. I arrived at the restaurant a little past 9:00 and waited inside as the prepared my order. My mind full of embarrassment, or rather the mere shock of forgetting my wallet, I mean I have never been known to do such a thing. So I was anxious to grab my food and be back on the road to Heather who called as I was pulling out of the apartment, I used my Mark Guymon tactics and told her a short end version of the story and that I was waiting for the food, and then I would be on my way home. So I was really ready to get back ASAP now. So I was back on the road around 9:25pm and the smell of hot chicken began to fill my Honda Accord. I was contemplating my day, and the occurrences that had happened up to that point. So I paid no attention to the food, or the music coming through the speakers. I arrived at the apartment and entered the door to a crying baby, and my wife leaning over her in the bed trying to comfort her, and get her to sleep. As I began to dip my chicken tender into the creamy mash potatoes Heather took her seat and realized not only did they falsify our order with a roll, and not a honey biscuit, but they also didn’t give us any drinks. So I was quickly back in the car and back on the road to Churches for the third time, and now it was 9:35pm. And I was running out of time. I arrived to a locked door and a line in the drive thru at Churches so I chose the line as opposed to the locked door. The line moved very slow, as I skipped past the speaker in font of the menu process, and headed straight for the window when my path was impeded by the slow moving line of two cars in front of me. So as I approached the window my clock read 9:58pm. I had my window rolled down, and quietly informed him that I they forgot my drinks, so he graciously gave me a larger set of drinks, and sent me on my way. I arrived home at around 10:08pm, and Heather still hadn’t eaten. So I sat down next to her on the red leather couch, after I put “October Sky in the DVD player, and pressed play, I began to continue dipping my chicken tenders into the now colder creamy mash potatoes. I took a sip of my larger Coke, and glanced over at my wonderful wife, the baby was asleep in the room, and I just though about how thankful I am for FAST FOOD!!!

Hi Five!

There aren't enough Hi Fives going on in the world today....

Hope For The Best, Yet Prepare For The Worst.

When my father died in Aug. 1998, I was just beginning my senior year of highschool, and essentially in the beginning of finding myself. Still living off of my parents testimonies and beliefs, I was beginning to want to learn things for myself. I began questioning things in my life, so when the loss of my father hit, my thought process began to unravel. I began to ponder and question many things regarding life. My brother told my mother weeks before the death of my father that she needs to start, "preparing for the worst." I quickly realized the importance of such a preparation. For about two weeks I was mentally unstable. Soon after much pondering, and personal discovery, I came to the conclusion that there are certain elements of this world which we can not control. One of the true gifts of this life on earth is the ability to "Act for ourselves."

I came up with the philosophy that we are a product of our own decisions. I know what some of you may think, I just said there are certain elements of this world that we have no control over, but what I mean by we are a product of our own choices, is that things occure in our lives and we have the "choice" of how to react to these elements in our lives. So I began living under the philosophy to "Hope for the best, yet prepare for the worst." So that way when a cotastrophy occurs in my own personal life, I have already mentally prepared myself for the worst, so I am already able to react in a much more postive way.

Recently I read a blog of my friends which spoke of such a thing, yet placed under a new set of terms, and words. He places the same philosophy to be able to accomplish certain goals. So instead of trying to control your situation, you merely react and move with the elements, and not against the elements. It still is heavy on my mind, exactly what type of mental steps must be taken in your thought process to be able to accomplish such a task. You see with my philosophy I know what type of mental steps must be taken in every decision, and situation. This may seem a little scattered, as I am basically writing my thought process to work my way through this philosophy. Now for example if I were to make a goal in my life to accomplish something I would in turn think of the worst possible outcome while trying to battle my way through the process of accomplishing this goal, and I prepare myself mentally to be able to deal with it, so if it were to happen it would no longer be a shock to me, and I would better react and deal with the situation and move on from that point. By doing so I live under the belief to live in the present, and treat that as a gift, and not to linger in the past, even if the past happens to be a matter of seconds away from your present standing. However my friend talked of situations where his "tapping in" helped him to accomplish the goal, and my beliefs don't help me accomplish that specific goal, because I could fail, my philosophy only helps me remain happy, and not in constant sorrow. Happiness being my main goal in life on a daily and eternal perspective.

“Never looking back or too far in front of me"

Written: Tuesday, June 14, 2005 on: www.xanga.com/skillzguymon

“We got arms but won't reach for the skies
Waiting for the Lord to rise
I look into my daughter's eyes
And realize that I'ma learn through her”(Common)

Hannah’s a little congested these days, so we have been trying to do the whole booger sucker thing…

I’m not sure if it is really working. She seems to be alright though. The other night I was up entertaining her till 2:00a.m. Then Heather grabbed her and rocked her and she fell asleep. That was Sunday night, but other than that she is growing and happy.

http://babysites.com/sites/guymon7237/

This is the new site Heather started for Hannah it is a little more nicer, It lets you share a lot more about Hannah and her growth than just pictures like the msn site. So go ahead and check that out. We usually try to update it with one or more pics every day.

“Never looking back or too far in front of me
The present is a gift
and I just wanna BE”(Common)

I try and do exactly this, everyday I try and not think or worry too much about what the futer holds for me. I mean I believe it is important to make goals, and also be pushing for some type of progression in the future, but I’m not speaking of this when I say I try not to worry about the future. It is more of the things I really don’t have much control over. Some things in life we don’t have control over happening to us. All we have to do is react in the correct ways. So I just try to stay in the present, and move through my life living for today, and not in yesterday, wishing I could go back, and at the same time I’m not trying to wish for things to be different as far as wishing I was living in the future. I just want to treat today as a gift.

In one of my areas on my mission there was this huge hill we had to walk up every day. I remember for the longest time I would walk up it staring at the top, and as I took each step it was like the hill just continued to grow, and appeared to never end. The heat would pound down on me, and the weight of my feet would start to grow heavier each step I took forward. Complaints would start to shower my mind. I would turn around and look back down the hill trying to see how much progression I made, and some times I would look back and wish I was back down the hill. So then one morning I started up the hill staring up to the top, and then I stopped and I thought I’m just going to look down, and just concentrate on where I am at that exact moment. When I did this, my climb to the top began to move quicker, the sun didn’t seem to be beating down so badly. That’s when it struck me, that life will be a lot easier to bare if I just be happy and content with today…